Thursday, October 21, 2010

Transitions

During times of transition, challenges abound.
  • Fear of the unknown 
  • "What if..." worrying
  • Effect on loved ones (emotionally & physically)
  • Facing yourself on those REALLY ugly days (I call these "meltdowns")
  • Picking yourself up on those REALLY ugly days
  • Trying to make it through the next transition "hoop" without falling on your face
  • Trying desperately not to alienate those around you (especially on the REALLY ugly days)
  • Getting acclimated to the new stuff while trying desperately not to cling to the old stuff
  • Figuring out who you are without the old identity & what the new identity is
  • Figuring out how to keep some of your old identity while forming a new & better one
  • Problem solving everyday problems with a giant question mark monkey on your back
In essence, transition is grief with growth opportunity.  Nobody wants the grief, but the growth opportunity is hard to resist.  So, we keep trudging forward during these times of grief with a carrot of possibility dangling in front of our faces.  Transition takes courage & initiative.  It's not easy to choose transition. In fact most of us would probably try to steer clear of it if we had the choice. I also takes perseverance.  It takes a good attitude to persevere.  It's not always easy, but sometimes you have to adopt the "fake it until you make it" attitude.  It takes commitment; commitment fueled by thoughts of what you wish to move away from & the opportunities that could lie ahead.  It's important to show yourself compassion during times of transition; physically, mentally, & emotionally.  Transition takes diligence & you can't muster up diligence without taking care of yourself. So be flexible if something doesn't go as planned.   Cooperation is also a necessity of the beast.  Just as you are going to need help from those around you, you need to strive to compromise with them. When we are facing "fear of the unknown", we tend to feel stubborn.  This stubbornness is born out of the desire to cling desperately to all that you think you know because everything else is such a mystery.  Not to worry though.  If you find it difficult to let go of this stubbornness, you still learn a lesson: humility.  Humility isn't pretty, but it is a necessary life lesson on this rocky road of change.  You will stumble. You will melt-down. You will feel unsure. You will alienate people.  You will have an identity crisis (probably a few). But hold on.  Be resilient, tenacious, and optimistic.  Use your integrity to strengthen your fortitude.  It all boils down to balance.  You don't have to be "the best" during these times.  You just have to balance your issues & survive.  These times are helping you to be your best down the road.  So, hold on for a bumpy ride & I'll meet you in the winner's circle. 

2 comments:

  1. You truly are a wise woman, and i'm eternally grateful to have you in my life. :)

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  2. Thanks "Scardanelli"...I love you & am also grateful to have you in mine. :-)

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